I hate to, but I have to.

 

I don’t know why going to work is such a pain in the ass for me. I used to love going to work because its the only place that I can forget everything.

But recently its also the place where I feel like I don’t belong.

See, I have thing this called “dissatisfaction” and “discontentment”. In my life, I haven’t been somewhere for a long time. I have always moved and moved. Made relationships and ended them. The only constant in my life is my hometown, San Miguel, my family and my two bestfriends, Lean and JB. Other than that, nothing else. I went from cute to emo to teenage angst to musikera to painter to i don’t know what else. Change was constant to me in every shape, way and form. It was, I guess, all I knew. I had the “Finding myself” and “Soul searching” thing on point.

With all these changes and adjustments, I lost so many. I also hope I earned a lot. I sure did learn a lot, and had a very realistic view of the world. None of this romantic bs. No rose-tinted glasses. What you see is what you get.

People say that I am strong, hard headed, a fighter, and that at first they weren’t expecting that. That makes me happy, in a way. I cultivated that. I made that. I trained myself to be someone people can be proud of. But not really.

I dont even know what I’m doing right now. Rambling? Ranting? I dont even fcking know. I guess that’s just what I had to say right now.

Approximately 25 minutes to work. Aabot ba ko? Haha 👑

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